Bucket??? We don't need no bucket, we need an ARK!

Well, I decided to come down to the beach as planned on Monday.  When I arrived in Wilmington, it was raining...and I mean raining.  The HIGH WATER sign on College Rd. did little to describe the amount of water that was in the roadway.  I trudged through (not very safe, I know, but one cannot just 'turn around, don't drown' in afternoon traffic) and made it safely to the beach place.  Little did I know how much it was going to rain!

Monday evening I took a walk on the beach.  This is my typical relaxing activity, as well as my exercise, when I am here.  I usually walk 3 miles, but it was looking rough over toward the mainland, so I decided to just walk a couple miles, and unfortunately for me, it started raining (again) when I was only about halfway into my 2 mile trek.  Needless to say, I got soaked.  Came back and undressed in the shower, where I had to wring the water out of my clothes!

Walking in the rain is good, though.  I don't remember the last time that I did that.  Usually in the rain, we are hurriedly dashing from place to place, under an umbrella or raincoat, trying to stay dry.  In this case, I knew that I was going to get soaked, so I just took my time, bare feet and all, and laughed at my predicament!

Little did I know, that the rain had just begun.  Today, Thursday, 4 days later, the area has had over TWENTY-TWO inches of rain.  It has finally stopped this evening, and gracious as God is, he left his calling card of hope to this area that is now gone from drought to floodstage in many areas.

Many times, I find myself walking through the proverbial rain, hurriedly trying to find the rainbow that I know must be there, even though I cannot see it.  I think there is a lesson here for me (and maybe for you too).  Slow down, walk, don't run, and enjoy the rain instead of trying to find a way to quickly get out of it.  Savor the feeling of the rivulets dripping into your face, tasting the rain on your tongue.  The rain will one day end.  The answer will come in time, and it will be beautiful, just like the rainbow.

Wandering is hard for someone who usually has goals....

So the other night while sleeping I had a dream.  I was wandering around one of the local college campuses, in the dark, searching for a building.  I kept wandering and wandering, asked people that I saw for directions, and kept on wandering, until finally I woke up, without finding my destination.

I went back to sleep, but when I woke up later I still remembered this dream.

I have been in grad school now for several years.  Going part-time on a dual degree- Masters in Health Administration and Masters in Nursing.  I started on this journey without a real goal in mind (which is really out of character for me), except to learn some new stuff, and of course, to get the degrees in the end.  People have asked me along the way, "So, what are you going to do when you get done?"  And I have replied "Well, I am not sure that I am going to do anything differently, because I love my job, but I think it will open doors if I choose to do something different."

At heart, I am a very goal-directed, concrete, analytical person.  I like to go from point A to point B (and as quickly as possible), so to not have an end game here has really been out there for me (could it have something to do with 40, quite possibly?).

I think I had the dream because I am getting close to finishing.  I have one more class and to complete my masters' project, and then I am DONE!  I have, I don't think, ever done anything in life like this that has left me wandering around, without knowing what, if anything, I am going to do with this not-so-cheap investment.  Can you put a price tag on gaining knowledge?  I have learned so much about my profession and so much about how health care works (or doesn't--that might be an interesting blog post!).  I have also met so many different and interesting people in my courses.  And I have learned that I may want to teach one day in an online environment such as the one that I am learning in now.  But, I don't have that answer that people seem to want to have "What are you going to do when you get done?"  And I am near done, and it kinda gnaws at my sense of purpose.

So, I guess I will just continue to have anxiety-fueled dreams, wandering around lost for a while.  I think that this may be good for me, to do something, just to say I have done it, without having to have a future goal in mind.  It takes me off of my beaten path of being driven.

So what about you?  Have you ever done something just to say you've done it, or learned something just for the sake of learning?

Me??? Blogging???

So, today I saw an article about the new book from the blog, Secret Regrets, and I thought, how interesting, a blog about regrets, but once I clicked on the link and was taken to the blog, I realized, how sad.  So many YOUNG people with SOOOOO many regrets!

Turning 40 recently, I had a change in perspective on life.  You realize that, quite possibly, half of your life is gone.  It makes you think, what have I not done that I need to do before...well...the deal is done~

I do have a few regrets, but those are for the younger set.  Reaching 40, I want to now not think about those, but instead, think about what I can do TO LIVE.  Deciding what dreams I need to put in my bucket.  To work toward positive things, happy things, make your heart race fast, wind in your face dreams!  So here you have it...me...blogging~

I would also like you to share your dreams with me.  What dreams do you have in your bucket?  Share your dreams with others on this blog~ Help them to fill up their bucket!

I will start us off on this journey.  One of my dreams is to live at the beach.  I love the beach and find it so soul-filling and peaceful.  The warm sun on my face, wind in my hair, the sound of the ocean roaring...each of my senses are fulfilled at the beach.  This dream is still in my bucket part-time, but when I pull it out, and spend time at the beach, I become a daydream believer!  So until I find a way to reach this dream, I travel to the beach as much as I can.  At least once a month, my dream comes out of the bucket, and I fill the bucket up with SAND!

So that will get the discussion started.  What dreams do you have in your bucket?  I cannot wait to hear them...maybe you will give me some ideas =D